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the Shut​-​in

by The Stay-In-Place Boat

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1.
overture 04:25
info
2.
canvas makes me want to scream 00:54
lyrics
Been awake for the past 24 hours Doing schoolwork for the past 13 So I think I might take a nice long long shower Cause I haven’t since September 15 Canvas makes me want to scream Canvas makes me want to scream Canvas makes me want to scream Canvas makes me want to scream Canvas makes me want to scream Canvas makes me want to scream Canvas makes me want to scream Canvas makes me want to scream
3.
tariff of abominations 05:19
lyrics
How long has it not been spring? How long have I been suffering? How long do the days get when you don’t care? And if you Turn on the shower just to stifle your screams Wake up every hour to remember your dreams How did I get this bruise? Tariff of abominations Why don’t I feel tired yet? Why don’t I feel like getting up? Why don’t the words just come out of my brain? (I don’t fucking know) And if you Spend half your life pushing ennui to extremes And skipping all the real work for the interesting scenes How did I get this bruise? Tariff of abominations (Break open my skull and pull the real me out of here, whoever the fuck that is) When it’s been six days since you last went outside And your friends and family are getting worried But it’s so hard to explain how it feels sometimes I, I, I, I don’t dare How the fuck is it 5 AM? I’ve been trying to sleep for like the past six weeks So I’ll go outside and stare at the moon again How long exactly was last week? Why do I always feel so weak? Why does every god damn thing have to break? And if you Turn on the shower just to stifle your screams Wake up every hour to remember your dreams How did I get this bruise? Tariff of abominations How did I get this bruise? Tariff of abominations That’s enough That’s enough That’s enough That’s enough That’s enough Oh, that’s enough That’s enough That’s enough That’s enough
4.
happy new fear 04:42
lyrics
I used to be afraid of the microwave But then I saw That I was wrong It’s been too long It keeps me up all night when I turn off my phone Maybe I always was the reason that I felt so alone So I tried a couple times, get it out in song But being honest’s always harder when you know you were wrong Because I probably mistreated you and it was bad Did I really have a reason to get that mad? Is this making any sense or am I thinking too much? Either way, I still would like for you to stay in touch I used to be afraid of the microwave I used to be afraid of the microwave I used to be afraid of the microwave I used to be afraid of the microwave I used to be afraid of the microwave
5.
the breakup song 04:16
lyrics
I’m not ready for what is to come These pills made me a horny mess My relationship’s been unsteady I’m putting myself through enough stress Enough is enough, I’m not ready 40 hours a week with work on Friday and Saturday It’s time to grow up I’m not ready for what is to come Please don’t hate yourself for this I wish I could switch it off I don’t want to see you in pain But I’m still unsure if we should cut it off I’m sorry we never got to kiss We still had so much to gain God, I’ve been such a piece of shit And you’ve been such a piece of shit And I’ve been so much more of a piece of shit And I’m so sorry And I get mad and you get mad And I get mad and you get mad I get mad and you get mad And I get mad and you get mad And I get mad and you get mad And I get mad and you get mad I get mad and you get mad And I get mad and you get mad And I’m not ready for what is to come I’m not ready for that I had no right to treat you like that two days ago I had no right to treat you like that two days ago How much have I done? How much damage have I done? What have I done? What have I done? What have I done? What have I done? I’m not ready for what is to come I’m not ready for that I’m not ready for what is to come I’m not ready for that
6.
benadryl 05:22
lyrics
I loved you in a way I had never loved anyone You were something I wanted to take care of There are so many ways that I want to express it but I know you don’t want that Cause you had nightmares about finally meeting me in person How did you live like this? (Something in the shower smells like trauma) (I’m so sick of this high school drama) I don’t know where it ends but (Take your glasses off and come to bed) Maybe we can try something When I was feeling good, you never felt the same way And when did “I love you” become “I’m not okay?” Why can’t you get up from that desk And get yourself some rest And stop making everything an excuse to leave? It gets old It gets old It gets old It gets old I wish you weren’t so right about this one I wish you weren’t so right about this one I wish you weren’t so right about this one I wish you weren’t so right about this one Move your body Tell somebody Move your body Tell somebody Move your body Tell somebody Move your body Tell somebody You must have some self-worth if you can’t care for anyone else You must have some self-worth if you can’t care for anyone else You must have some self-worth if you can’t care for anyone else You must have some self-worth if you can’t care for anyone else
7.
stay safe, stay in place 06:52
lyrics
Looking at pictures from a year ago It was just a school day We didn’t have to think about Where to breathe Looking at pictures from a year ago Almost impossible to see I used to live in a crowd with a bunch of strangers All breathing in each other’s air So quick to embrace The new normal Stay safe, stay in place Stay safe, stay in place Looking at pictures from a year ago I was younger back then I was cuter back in February At least, I think so I feel a lot different now Guess I’ve grown An inch or two or three or five or six or seven And I was in D.C. Like 5 years ago Breathing the open air All these weird flesh creatures Spoke to each other At a comfortable distance Stay safe, stay in place Stay safe, stay in place Stay safe, stay in place Stay safe, stay in place That little blue-eyed virgin Shares a name with me But I don’t remember what he looked like How’d he feel? What’d he dream? How’d he sleep? Or go in public? These people have real faces In open spaces You can see them go Stay safe, stay in place Stay safe, stay in place Stay safe, stay in place Stay in place Stay in place Stay in place I’d like to meet you I’d like to meet you at a later time

about

written in its entirety over the past year, "the Shut-in" is a collection of songs about meeting, losing, and being isolated from friends. (also, the existential pain that is online schooling.) it marks a strong departure from the previous sound and energy of the Stay-In-Place Boat, both as a result of a differing headspace and teenage savings being spent on new equipment.

it's intended as a musical journal of sorts.

credits

released March 12, 2021

written & recorded by spencer baumann

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The Stay-In-Place Boat Grand Rapids, Michigan

i also like drugs and drinking water

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